label consciousness, materialism and a new body image

i've started reading again
I just finished reading "The Coldest Winter Ever" by Sister Souljah. I finished it in one day; it was an exciting page-turner. The main character, Winter, reminds me of a few around the way girls I know.

I agree with much of Sean Elder's opinion of the book.

The first part plays like a protracted rap video: Everything is fly and phat, Winter's father spares his wife and daughters no luxury, and nothing is generic. Versace, Courvoisier, Chanel, Mo봠-- there are enough brand names to make Bret Easton Ellis proud. (Even her twin sisters are named Mercedes and Lexus.) But then the whip comes down in the form of young and hungry competitors and RICO-empowered federal agents. Winter's father goes to jail, and her survival becomes the story. Then Sister Souljah herself turns up.

Winter's reaction the first time she hears Souljah speak is typical: "How is this bitch supposed to help the community when she don't know how to rock her shit? I checked her arm, no Rolex, not even a Timex, nothing. No weight on her neck, nothing. Her hairdo was phat but that don't mean nothing when you don't know how to accessorize." Before long, though, she's seeking refuge in the activist's house, where she comments with typical disdain on her host's art ("African titties everywhere and wooden mask carvings") and appearance ("She was a typical uptown girl: big ass, wide hips and, nope, not a flat belly"). But she remains deaf to the Sister's message of uplift. What Souljah does have going for her is men, and the injustice of it all is too much for Winter. Here some back-to-Africa, celibate, fat (not phat) sister act is getting all the action while Winter needs to steal to get by.

Winter is the book's most compelling character. I got tired of the constant self-references by Sister Souljah , no disrespect All in all it was a good book and I'm going to read it again before the weekend is over. Slower this time. I'm at home sick and have nothing else to do. Send soup?

increasing my reading list
While slacking off over at Salon, I came across this article about Bret Easton Ellis. It was an inspirational read on two different levels and now I have plans to make a few new book purchases before the week is over. I love a book review that encourages me to want to read more of an author's work and write better. I love a book that gets my creative juices flowing. Sometimes that muse is walking around in your clothing.

materialistic and label conscious
I notice that in all of the Bret Easton Ellis books-turned-into-movies I've seen, his characters are incredibly obsessed with labels and material possessions. In Coldest Winter, Winter is obsessed with labels and"things". I was having a conversation with my hairdresser last night about, among other things, material possessions and name-brand items. I have always imagined that I am not label conscious, but after reading this book I realized how much I really am. It's not so much that I have to have everything name-brand; it's just the big names are making everything that is cute!

I have never made a secret of my favorite hobby. I shop till I drop and then I get up and do it all over again. I was told two weeks ago by David that I was "high-maintenance" and "obsessed with being cute." Is there anything wrong with wanting to look my best and have the best? Why do we hate on people that do?

I feel like no one can take care of me better than I can take care of me, so I'm going to do the damn thing and fuck anyone who doesn't like it. My hustle is legal, my ends are taxed and I don't rob or steal from anyone to get what I want. Don't hate because you aren't able to keep yourself up in the manner in which you would like to; congratulate me because I am able. I spoil myself because I deserve it.

the new body consciousness
That said, I have to admit that I had to put a hold on the actual clothes buying. I spent a great deal of money in Lane Bryant last month and this month on cute outfits and I'm finding that some things I bought just a month ago are fitting a little too loose for my taste.

We've gotten really serious about the healthy eating/living thing in this household and since the beginning of the year I've lost 15 pounds. In my opinion, the loss is most noticeable around my mid-section. It's obviously noticeable somewhere because I have people asking me if I am losing weight on a daily basis and that is uber-cool all on its own. Negative body image is a mother fucker, but once you affirm to love yourself as you are and actually put that into work everyone else falls in love with you too.

but i still find stuff to shop for
Just because I'm losing weight doesn't mean I can't buy purses, shoes and make up. And that is just what I have been doing. Oh and cute things. Like these cute little notecards from the shoe store that have pictures of shoes on them and are called "mad about shoes". I've been writing letters on them and sending them to people. If you would like to receive a letter from me on my cute little notecards, email me with your address. Once I run out of the cute little shoe notecards, I'll use the other cute little notecards I have. How many times did I say cute little notecards in that sentence?

I think I should be banned from the MAC counter. In two weeks I've spent $200 on lipstick, make up brushes, eyeshadow, lipliner, blush and lipglass (how can you not love lipglass?). And perfume? Forget about it. I love to smell sweet. We went to the Alley in L.A. two weeks ago and I bought four bottles (two for me and two for ms stella) for $140. Not too shabby I say. Your girl will shop for a bargain. That's why I don't feel bad that some of that Lane Bryant stuff doesn't fit anymore. When you spend $350 and walk out with 12 new outfits, 2 bracelets, 5 pairs of earrings, a necklace, 2 leather belts and 15 pairs of pretty panties can you really complain? I didn't think so either.