i am so sorry to hear this. A lot of stuff got said about her in the media but we all have issues. I liked the way she rapped.
April 2002 Archives
i have a bad case
of wanderlust and it won't
be cured 'til June 8th.
Hi. If you have sent email to me in the past few days I have not received it. Something is wrong with my email and I don't know what it is and I'm waiting for my host to get back to me. In the meantime, you can direct mail to me here.
edit: it's working just fine now.
i was down but i'm back up now. thank you dreamhost for hooking it up. i would like to say that it was not dreamhost's fault that my site was down. it was totally my own. so on the one year anniversary of me hosting with them i can say that the entire time i have only experienced about 1/2 hour of downtime. run on over there and sign up with them. some people complain that their prices are high but i think i get what i pay for.
Tell them monique sent you.
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I knew I'd be that Michael. I just knew it.
I remember the days when I could stay up all night partying until three in the morning and still get up at seven to be at work on time. I could do it for several nights in a row and really feel nothing. Lately, by the time eleven rolls around I am ready to lie in the bed and pass out. Part of it is the weed I’m sure but the other part of it is getting older I think. Bleh.
So I’m up early on a Saturday morning again. I’m going into work today. My job is so easy that I feel nothing when I volunteer to work four hours on a Saturday. It goes by so quickly that it’s over. By the time I get off from work I’m already dressed and ready to do my thing in the city on a Saturday afternoon. And when I get my check and see how fat it is after all that overtime, I’m even more pleased. So there you go.
Today is 4/20. I wanted to come up with a witty post about marijuana and smoking and so forth but I don’t have the energy to think of anything insightful. :o) Maybe someone could explain where exactly the phrase 420 came from. I’ve heard so many different stories and no one seems to agree on anything except that it represents marijuana.
I’ve been going to Starbucks all week and the service hasn’t been that bad. I’m happy. I’ll be stopping there today too on my way in to work. I need the coffee to give me a jolt.
Happy Saturday. :o)
some other notes:
This blog is probably going to be moving to a new domain as I make room on hideouskinky.net for another project I've decided to work on. Details are sketchy at this time so stay tuned. I will make an announcement before the move and for the first few weeks this site will redirect to the new one to give all ten of you a chance to change your links. :op
I'm still working on the layout at the new domain. Movable type 2.0 is already installed and I've played with it enough to see the neat stuff it does. I'm just working on all the templates. I'm thinking May 1st as a launch date for the new domain. It was purchased a while ago. I'm just now getting around to deciding what I wanted to do with all this web space I have. Yay dreamhost.
Knockout Kings 2002
I played Knockout Kings 2002 for the PlayStation 2 earlier this week. That game is phenomenal. I like it better than I liked the first Knockout Kings. This game features Muhammad Ali, Evander Holyfield, Lennox Lewis, Joe Frazier, Oscar De La Hoya, Felix Trinidad and a host of others that you will recognize. There are tons of moves and punches and I have yet to learn them all as I only got a chance to get on the stick once. The guys dominated the playing time, but it’s ok. I got a chance to see them try out a lot of the moves that are available. My favorite? The bitch slap. Watching Muhammad Ali and Lennox Lewis stand in the middle of the ring and repeatedly bitch slap each other made my night on Monday. I was in tears from laughing. Seriously. I don’t think this game will replace GTAIII in my world, but I think it will edge out some others that I like on PS2. The graphics are great, the soundtrack is hip hop and it’s worth checking out.
The Dust Storm
When I walked outside the house on Monday morning to go to work the sun was shining bright in the sky and the day was clear. It had been like that for the past few days here in Las Vegas. Saturday and Sunday were absolutely gorgeous, sun-filled days. I didn’t need a jacket or sleeves on either day. People were making comments about the weather changing so suddenly. We literally went from winter to summer in a matter of days as the temperature switched from a mild 60 degrees to 95 degrees by the weekend. With the sun shining so bright so early in the morning, I thought Monday was going to be another day like that.
I watch the sun from my window at work. I look out at the sky and see it, all blue and inviting. It makes me want to sit outside and soak up hours of rays. Our entire building is glass. We see sunlight from every room at some angle because there are nothing but windows all around us. I like to look out and watch the sun.
Monday as I sat watching the sky and the sun with Busta Rhymes’ “Pass the Courvosier” playing in my head, I noticed the trees swaying back and forth. They were dancing around in their spots, as if keeping time with the rhythm of the music in my head. They looked like they were waving their hands back and forth, heads bobbing from one side to the other as they performed a very complex version of the Harlem shake.
When I jumped up at half past one to take my lunch, I didn’t bother grabbing anything other than my wallet and my badge. I did a swift walk to the front lobby. I was ready to feel the sun on my skin. They had been freezing us out all morning with the air in the building and I wanted that desert air and sun to warm me up. As I stepped into the vestibule, I could see through the glass doors that the trees were still doing their dance. Only this time it wasn’t really a Harlem Shake. It was more like they were dancers in a Luke video. They were shimmying from left to right at a frenetic pace. I needed to get a closer look. I put my hand on the door and before I could even apply enough pressure on the handle to open it, the wind whipped it from my hand, blowing it out and away from the building. I felt sucked out by the vacuum. As soon as I stepped foot outside, dust and wind filled my eyes, nose and mouth, making it hard to breathe and see. I closed my mouth to prevent myself from eating any of it but it was too late. I could already feel sand in my teeth. I tried hiding behind a wall outside to prevent the wind from attacking me. It didn’t work. The wind continued its assault I felt like I was in a losing fight. As I tried to get into the car, the wind kept blowing the door closed and I had to jerk my hand back to prevent my fingers from being smashed in it. The wind shook the car as I rode down the street and I had a hard time trying to see through the thick cloud of dust that was sitting just at street level. Trees, garbage cans and racks of those “Nude Girls Now!” flyers lay in the street, having been blown over by the wind.
Once back at work, I opened the door to get out of the car, and the wind tore it from my hand and it blew open. For a minute I thought it was going to fold back and hit the car, like the tab on an aluminum can. I ran back into the building and sat in my seat. I didn’t go back outside until it was time to go home, and by that time the desert tornado had moved on to someplace else. The drive home was uneventful.
The wind tried to kick up a little yesterday but it was nothing like the storm we had on Monday. I still came home with dust and dirt in my ears and hair. My tee shirt looks dusty too. I still love living in the desert though. I wouldn’t give up 355 days of sun a year if you paid me. Well, maybe if you paid me.
things i still need to remember to write about:
The dust storm on Monday (and today apparently)
knockout kings 2002 for PS2
my pedicure and being in the nail shop
things i'm still working on:
movable type 2.0
new layout
new links page
and now a pointless story about starbucks:
My favorite Starbucks is located on the western side of town near Summerlin and the 95. Everyone in that shop knows me by name, they know what drink I like to order and they know how to fix it perfectly for me so that I don’t have to add anything to it. From the first day I walked into that Starbucks the staff was nothing but friendly to me. It was right down the street from my old job so I would go in each morning before work to have a cup of coffee and sit down to write for about an hour. I became familiar with all the other regulars and we had a sense of belonging with each other. When someone missed their regular morning visit all the rest of us would ask where that person was. I liked it.
This is a popular Starbucks so there is a constant crowd there. This doesn’t seem to bother the great group of gals that work there though. The barista working the bar insists on starting drinks for those that are in line so that by the time they pay, their drink is already done and they can just grab it and go. I always marveled at their efficiency and it didn’t surprise me that the tip buckets they leave out are always overflowing with money. And people aren’t just dumping change in there either. I’ve seen five dollar bills in that tip bucket. Hell, I always leave them a tip. It’s just good service that I think everyone can appreciate in the morning.
When I got my new job, my favorite Starbucks was no longer convenient to my commute to work. It would take me twenty minutes out of my way if I wanted to go there so I had to find a different Starbucks to go to. One morning while trying to find a quick route to the new job, I stumbled upon a brand new Starbucks that had just opened.
The first time I walked in there the staff was overly friendly. They asked everyone who walked through the door how they were doing. They worked in groups of three to try and get the orders processed as quickly as possible. The dining area was neat and the additive stand was neat; there was no trace of mess in the entire store. I thought I had found a new home. The added bonus was that since it was so new, not too many people were aware that it was there and I could get in and out fairly quickly in the morning.
Four months later, the service has turned to shit. Whenever I go in there, I stand in line no less than ten minutes and then I have to wait another five before my drink is ready. The staff always seems more occupied with the conversations they are having than giving the customers service. I’ve had to correct them on my drink several times, and it urks me to no end when I have to tell them that the milk is empty or there’s no sugar. I was under the impression that these are things they are supposed to be doing every hour on the hour. Especially checking the milk. It’s coffee after all, someone is going to want to add cream. Even though there is an exceptionally charming brother who works the register and always greets me with a “Good morning sister” when I walk in, I am ready to write to the Starbucks corporate office and complain about the service. I leave there each morning with an attitude.
Yesterday I went to get my eyebrows waxed. My favorite Starbucks is right down the street from the shop where I get waxed so after my appointment I made a beeline for the coffee. As soon as I walked in the door, I was greeted by a chorus of people singing my name and asking me where I’ve been. This happens anytime I pop in, which is mostly on weekends or when I go to the salon. I returned the enthusiastic greetings and waited in line to order my drink. The girls had me ready in no time. This is service, I thought. I left a five dollar tip because it felt good to do so. Those girls work hard. I miss those girls.
When Kitty asked me how I had been, I explained to her my concerns about the other Starbucks. She just smiled and said, “We all aren’t the same honey.”
No, they aren’t. This morning, my commute will take me back to the Starbucks with the shitty service. I am going to order my drink and wait patiently for it to be prepared and hope that things will go just a little bit better this morning. I think it’s worth mentioning that all the staff at my favorite Starbucks are women whereas the majority of the staff at the new Starbucks is male. Let’s hear it for guys who don’t give a shit and just do their job without any effort to be good at doing it.
And still, I pay the four bucks a cup because caffeine is an addiction I am not ready to give up yet and there is no other convenient place for me to get my fix. In this town, Starbucks has the monopoly. Those bastards.
Some things I need to remind myself to talk about:
The Dust Storm yesterday.
Knockout Kings 2002 for PS2
My pedicure and being in the nail shop
Starbucks (again)
Some things I am working on for the site:
Upgrading to Movable Type 2.0 - it’s a process. I am trying to start a new directory for the blog while still keeping these entries visible.
A new layout. (the escribitionist joke is old now)
Reorganizing my links.
we had no spring here
from winter to summer in
two weeks flat. it’s hot.
I am more critical of myself than I am of others, especially in writing. I had a discussion with Jason the other day and I realized that I was being critical of my output on the web. Initially I thought I was dissatisfied with what others were doing but I realized that the problem starts within.
I told Anitra that I thought the web was dead. No one has anything to say anymore. This isn’t a bad thing; it could just be a widespread case of writer’s block. I wasn’t being critical of anyone. I notice as I pass through my usual reading list that either people aren’t writing or they aren’t writing anything that is holding my attention. I am craving new things to read.
Weblogs gave voice to the common Joe in two ways. It gave us a way to have a presence on the web. Let’s thank people like Evan, Andrew, Noah, Mena and Ben for that. They made publishing to the web easy for those of us who had to use the Geocities Easy Editor when we originally came to the web. They made it simple for writers like me to be able to put our writing out there for an audience, be it an audience of one or one thousand.
I came into this whole blogging thing a year ago this month. I registered my first domain on April 23rd. I didn’t know what I wanted to do when I came to the world of blogging so I looked at other sites and tried to figure out how it was “supposed” to be done. I thought there was a formula. I followed that “formula” to some degree. I linked to things I found on the net. I linked to diary entries that I found intriguing. I linked to silly and asinine things. I made fun of my friends and myself. I had a lot of fun.
Then the newness of it all wore off and I was in this blogging life for better or worse. I realized I wanted to do more. I read sites by people who were just writing - not linking, not editorializing - just writing. I wanted to do that too. The first time I read Alison’s site I was impressed. She was writing and doing it well. She was telling her stories and sharing of herself without being boring. She wasn't’ a “formula” blog. She didn’t just link, link, and link. That was attractive to me. I didn’t really want a link blog either. I wanted to write and share and have people understand me for me. Thus, Hideous Kinky was born.
From July of 2001 until now I have been writing on Hideous Kinky. Sometimes I write long entries and other times I don’t feel like writing anything at all. There were times when I felt like quitting. The “pressure” to impress and be all that everyone wanted me to be was overwhelming. And then I woke up. I realized that I don’t have to do this for anyone but me. I don’t have to stand up tot he criticism of anyone but me. Sure, we all want to be accepted by others, but at what cost? Selling ourselves short?
So what do I want to do now? That’s a question I have to ask of myself. Jason and I were discussing what we would like to see done differently on the web. I know what I like when I come to the web. I like to see people sharing. I like good writing. I like to read people who are discussing their world and how it is shaping them. It helps me to see my world a little differently too. Links blogs are cool too. Sometimes I find things in blogs that I probably wouldn’t have found otherwise. I have an appreciation for that. I do wish that more people wrote though. I have this desire to write and share my writing and discuss with other writers the trails and tribulations of the writer’s life. I am drawn to people with sites that focus on good writing.
I would like to see more of that on the web. Jason and I agreed that they way to accomplish that is through leading by example. When I came to the web, I followed the examples of those that were there before me. I followed very closely in the beginning and then as I got more practice I developed my own style. I am happy with the progression I’ve made since I started blogging. I have learned a lot from doing it. Blogging encouraged me to learn HTML so that I didn’t have to depend on programs like Dreamweaver and FrontPage and WYSIWYG editors to make layouts. It encouraged me to experiment with other programs too, like Fireworks and Photoshop and Paint Shop Pro. It encouraged me to learn about CSS, PHP and how to do includes and things like that. I’ve come a long way.
There are still more roads to cross though. As a writer, I need to stop posting “I ate eggs for breakfast this morning” and leaving it at that. Instead, I need to explain why it should matter to the reader that I ate the eggs. “I ate an egg this morning and as I stuck my fork into it and broke the yolk, I realized there was an unborn chicken spreading its embryonic form across my plate. From the chicken’s womb to my mouth without so much as a thought to the life that could have been. We all eat eggs for breakfast. Eating eggs is the same as giving chickens an abortion isn’t it? Where are the people standing outside the chicken coops with Pro-Life signs protesting that?”
I feel the need to express and explain and to make people understand. So where do we go from here?
For me the novelty of the web has worn off. I feel fully initiated into this club of people sharing ideas across networks and state lines and oceans and political parties and social statuses. I feel as if I could be adding something more to the medium, something that will have meaning in the years to come. There is a difference now.
Originally all I cared about were hits and traffic to my site. I didn’t care who was there; I just wanted people to be there. A year later I realize that I share Candi’s sentiments - there are too many eyes and not enough ears here. Something has got to change. The train wreck phenomenon has passed. We no longer have to sit and stare at websites waiting for something to happen. We can take the initiative and make it happen.
I am not here to tell anyone else how they should do their website. I can only hope that what I do will inspire someone else to try and do the same thing and from there it will catch on. I say let’s not be critical of what other people put forth. Instead, let’s be examples of what we would like to see and let the rest come naturally.
Yes, the novelty of the net has worn off for me. It’s no longer new or foreign. I am a full participant with a Google ranking to prove it. Now it’s time to move on. It’s like when you are training on a new job. There is a learning curve and then there comes the time when the boss expects you to be up to speed and doing your thing without any help. I feel like I am at that stage now. Playtime is over. It’s time to get serious.
I’m ready for people to pay attention and listen. I feel ready to use the medium for what it can do for me - get my writing out there and let people hear what I have to say.
What are you ready to do with the web?
first of all ...
I’m up early for a Saturday morning. I volunteered to work today. Welcome to my Saturday.
i have a complaint
There is a Starbucks that I frequent on my way to work because the location is very convenient. I need my caffeine rush in the morning and I am extremely crabby when I don’t get it. This particular Starbucks is new. It’s only been open for a couple of months. When it originally opened the service was spectacular. Everyone in the joint was extremely friendly, they greeted you as soon as you walked in the door and you got your cup exactly as you wanted it.
Flash forward to four months later. The service is shitty, you have to remind them to put new milk and sugar out, the counter where you add stuff to your coffee is always a mess and they always have a line out the door with ONE person working the register and four people working the bar having conversations that have nothing to do with coffee but apparently involve so much that the baristas often move ten times slower while fixing drinks. This makes for a very pissed off Monique in the morning, let me tell you. I think I’m going to write a letter.
the elitism debate
So the battle rages on in the comments of the elitism post. The only dissenting voice is Anil’s and I think he is taking some things that people are saying the wrong way but I will let them debate it out and I will simply moderate and add my two cents as necessary. Some points I would like to make clear though:
1. No one is against anyone else having a good blog. I don’t think that is the point or the basis of anyone’s argument. I think we all agree that the argument is against those who would assume that they are the authority on what constitutes a good or bad blog. Anil states he wants to call bullshit on people who put out crap. Fine. If someone is putting out crap you are more than welcome to stop reading. We aren’t saying that we are the champions for everyone putting out crap. We are saying that we are champions for the free expression the web affords us. I run across sites with content that I don’t find engaging every single day. I don’t discredit those sites as not being worthy of any attention, I simply don’t read them. I don’t think it’s right to say, “Well so and so writes crap so he doesn’t deserve to be called a blog (or have a site or whatever else you want to add there)”.
Anil said - "Everything I do is good, simply because I have done it." seems to be their attitude, and I call bullshit on it. You all but call out Kottke, 'cause I know his site isn't interesting to you. But he has *never*, not once, said he's better than someone. He has *never*, not once played like the fact that he's well known in this one little bitty community means shit. That's all come externally, from other people who want someone to pick on for being popular, and they almost always incidentally have shitty sites.”
I have never come across any cam girl site that has that attitude. I think cam girls are having fun and we should allow them that. So it’s not your cup of tea. No one is forcing you to look at it. And no, Jason Kottke’s site is not interesting to me but I never once said that he called himself better than anyone else. I was speaking to those who would have you think that he was the weblogging messiah and we should all follow in the footsteps of him and his 12 apostles. Not everyone has the same style. That is my point.
Also, saying that someone has a shitty site is a matter of personal opinion. What you think is shitty someone else might think is cool. What doesn’t appeal to you may appeal to someone else. That is the point in all situations. I am arguing that people should stop trying to tell everyone else how to do their fucking thing. It’s what creates situations where people feel like they can’t post what they want for fear of what someone else might say about it and that is plain wrong. You know it and I know it. Enough said.
You've got a great site, Mo, you know that. And it's important that everyone feels that they have something to say and a place to say it on the web. But it's stupid and, worse, boring, to not want to be good at whatever particular genre interests you. And I'm *glad* there are people pushing others to do better.
Maybe those people don’t want to do better Anil. Maybe they are content to keep doing what they are doing. Maybe they aren’t doing their thing for anyone else. Maybe it is just all about them. Why should they change it up just because it doesn’t suit what you would consider a good site. What if all the cam girls and e/n site holders decided they didn’t like your site because you talk about tech stuff a lot. Does it make your site any worse than theirs just because they don’t have an appreciation for your particular style?
Does anyone own the web? Who are we to tell people how they should and shouldn’t express themselves? Not everyone sets out to have some stellar website with thousands of hits and gawkers coming along. Some people do it just for fun, to learn or whatever else. It’s not fair to tell them that they should change it up because you don’t like the fact that they don’t use a spellcheck and proper grammar. That is elitist and it proves my point.
My very first website was not all that hot. It was full of crap and it looked funny cause I didn't know what to do. We need to allow people room for growth. Everyone is not going to jump out of the starting gate with a page mocked up in CSS, replete with SAT words and MLA structure. Let's let them grow into it. Even in my writing books it says that you have to allow people to crank out the crap before they can start generating the beauty.
I like what AB said - That is an essential point -- weblogs and personal sites are about PEOPLE. With a book or an essay there's an implicit artistic standard, but not everyone creates a weblog with the intention of creating art. Some people are just there to be themselves. Such sites can't be judged by artistic standards any more than the average person would want to be judged by beauty pageant standards. It's not that they meet or don't meet the standard of beauty, it's that they never even entered the contest! So yeah, you can pick those sites apart all you want, but what's the point?
So what is the point? The point is that people are people and we should live and let live. I’m tired of people trying to be the deciding factor on what is good or bad on the web. Personal choices. We make them when we read the web, we make them when we do the web. Not everyone sets out to try and be some internet superstar that NO ONE else in the world knows except other people on the web. Live and let live. Jason said “do what the beat say do”. I agree with that.
Lastly - What's next? People are going to get called sell outs if their site starts getting lots of hits? "I remember when he used to be real, a straight up standard BlogSpot template, broken permalinks, no comment function. Now he's cleaned up and started doing more than just commenting on CNN Entertainment links, he's not down anymore..."
Now you are just taking it totally out of context. Stop it.
edit - 10/5/02 i guess i really need to add those comments cause it really was a great discussion
to my people who don't want to go to work, thank god it's friday
Today is Friday and for me it’s payday. Woo hoo cause I am having a paper shortage at the moment. Now I get a refill. Yes. I live paycheck to paycheck. It's how I do my shopping and extracurricular activities. And so you know what that means. This weekend, shopping. Yes, I do save some money. I don't have to explain to you what I do. Shut the fuck up. :op
dreams
Last night my friend Andrea was in my dream. In the dream we got into an argument and she was chasing me down so I hid from her. She found me and I was like what and she was like what and I don’t remember the rest.
friday shout outs
I stayed up way too late last night chatting with Anil. Sometimes a good discussion with a friend is all you need to open your eyes to things you hadn’t realized before. Thanks Anil.
So my post yesterday got a lot of people thinking. Good. That’s what it was supposed to do. I think we all need to be more conscious of the vibe and the energy that we put out there. Someone asked me if I was going to be the champion of all the dumb websites. No. I am simply saying live and let live. So something is not your style. Skip over it and move on to the next. It’s a world wide web. There is plenty out there for consumption. Thanks to Xkot, Saima and Sandra it brought a lot of new people to my site too. I even heard from AB. Yay. Welcome.
So Jason hooked me up with a link to Arts & Letters Daily. I am sad to say I have never seen this site before. Now I am hooked on it. So much stuff to read. I find myself bored at work between calls (yes, I work in a call center) and since we can surf the web I am always looking for something to read. When I‘m done reading my blog links, I like to read other things like Metafilter and the news sites. Now I have Arts & Letters Daily to give me something to think about. Thank you Jason.
My friend George is on the mend. I got to chat with him last night. I don‘t get to chat with George nearly as much as I used to but whenever I do I always come away from it feeling like I learned something.
And of course you know I love my bottle sucking girlfriend Lanie.
Traci R. Smith, I have not heard from you. What is going on? I thought you were coming out here soon. Email me or something.
summer of 1971: i'm eating frosted flakes
Anil Dash: yum
Anil Dash: i'm cropping a picture of a drunk mena trott
summer of 1971: haha
summer of 1971: mena and ben rock
Anil Dash: no shit
summer of 1971: the new MT is the shizzle
Anil Dash: nicest kids in the world, too
Anil Dash wants to send file mena ice.jpg.
summer of 1971 received c:\download\summerof1971\mena ice.jpg.
summer of 1971: ha
summer of 1971: smirnoff ice
Anil Dash: :-D
summer of 1971: malt liquor for the white folks
Anil Dash: yup
Anil Dash: New English
summer of 1971: LOL
summer of 1971: New English
summer of 1971: oh my god
summer of 1971: comedy
Anil Dash: :-D
on dreams
I only remember bits and pieces of the dreams I had last night. I do remember in one dream I had a baby that I was very protective of. I didn’t even want to let people hold the baby. Weird.
and now a rant ...
I was speaking with my fellow neo-beat last night and I realized what it is that I miss about the web. Remember when all everyone had was pages on Geocities and that was all the rage? Remember when the web wasn’t so pretentious? Remember when people didn’t try to label or pigeonhole your site as one form of presentation or another? We need to take it back to the old school.
I remember when I came to the web. All I wanted to do was write poems and stories and share my experiences with people so that perhaps they may be able to relate to me and learn something from it just as I had. I tend to think that the world is about sharing. We all need to share with each other and from those experiences grow richer in mind and heart. It doesn’t happen like that anymore.
It seems like all anyone cares about is who stole whose design, who is getting the most hits and/or comments, who writes better than whom and who has a better site structure than whom. That is so tired. Wake up people.
Here is this medium. It is so vast. It has the power to unite us all and help us to grow as humans. We are still learning new things about it every single day. Yet we still feel the need to create classes amongst each other. The often mentioned “A-list” is a perfect example. Saima said it best. They are just blogs people, get over it. Yeah. Get over it. Since when did being on the web become grounds for some kind of pseudo-celebrity that one uses to seem superior over others? Sure, some people have been on CNN and TechTV and other stations because they are adding something to the medium but does that make them better than anyone else?
I still read Metafilter on a daily basis. I don’t post there as much though because I am really turned off by the attitudes over there. Some people have it in their heads that Metafilter is the gathering place for the “upper echelon” of uber geeks and anyone else that comes by is not worthy of attention. It says at the top that it is a community weblog but I didn’t see much community over there when the “cam girls” paid a visit. You have never seen so much venom in your life. People saying things just to be mean and insulting. Even Matt, the creator of Metafilter, likened the cam girls’ visit to people crashing a party. What? The Metafilter regulars said that they were turned off by the behavior of some members of the cam girl party but instead of trying to make their point in a valid way they resorted to insults and calls of “who invited you to post here anyway”?
If we are all about building community then we all have something to learn from each other. We shouldn’t be shutting our minds to those that have thought processes that flow differently from ours. Even if the only thing you learn from another person is that you want to strive like hell not to be that way, you have gained something from your interaction. Stop being so fucking uppity. It’s sickening.
Everyone has a voice. The web has given us a place where everyone can be heard. You can share a bit of your life and time with people who live an entire world away from you. You can help others to understand why it is that you don’t like bananas, or why you think designer labels are stupid, or how it feels to be in an MRI chamber or how it feels to hurt after a break up. One form of expression is not any more special than another.
Just because I don’t post a lot of links to shit people have already linked to multiple times on other websites does not mean I don’t have anything valid to share. Just because I sometimes have to reference an HTML bible to figure out how to do something with my page does not make me any less a part of this than you. Just because I like to write about stupid people I encounter, places I have been and what it’s like to live in Las Vegas doesn’t mean my points are not valid. Just because I don’t always use proper punctuation and grammar doesn’t mean I don’t have anything profound to say.
Just because you have been blogging since Jesus was a child doesn’t make you better than anyone else. Just because you kiss Jason Kottke’s ass doesn’t mean you are better than anyone else is. Jason Kottke is not better than anyone else. Stop worshipping people on the net like they are god and start contributing something yourself so we can all link to you too. There are more than just a few people on the web, yet you would think it was a small club the way reading circles are so incestuous. If you go against the grain of what is technically considered a “blog” then your site isn’t a blog. It’s a journal or a vanity site or whatever else it can be labeled as except a blog. Guess what people? Not everyone cares to link to the same shit we can all find on FoxNews or MSNBC or whatever other news channel you choose to link us to. Be like Laura. Link us to something we might not otherwise find. Be like George. Explain to us why you are linking to what you are linking to and why it should mean anything to us. Inspire dialogue. Be like Cecily. Be like Anitra. Be like Stephanie. Plainly stated, be original.
This is like the Matrix. There is no blogging formula. We are all free to do what we want to do with our space, so let’s do it.
Everyone is so afraid to step out of the box. Fuck it. I’m stepping out.
I don’t care what you think anymore. I don’t care if you don’t like what I have to say anymore. I don’t care if you never read this again. If even one person is impacted by something I write, then I have accomplished what I came here to do. Sharing.
It’s a concept. You should try it.
You can flame me in the comments. kthxbi.
edit: this post and the subsequent posts on the same topic generated a lot of discussion. maybe i will get off my ass and enter all the comments in by hand because I feel like they need to be shared but that day won't be today. -10/5/02
It is not unusual for me to tell him funny stories about things that happen in my faux love life. I especially like sharing anecdotes with him from my building collection of “When Good Sex Goes Bad” stories. He’s usually amused and so I didn’t think he’d find anything odd about me sharing this experience with him. Although until that point we’d never had a conversation like this in person, I was not shy about sharing with him the gory details of what went down.
“OK, “ I began, “he had his hand on my breast and he leaned over to kiss me and damn, he was a good kisser.”
He nodded his head. His reaction was not what I expected so I continued.
“He was good with his tongue,” I said.
He laughed this time. He kept typing away on his computer like I wasn’t even there and I felt like he was only half listening. I started to get annoyed.
“I want to be kissed like that again and again,” I said.
This time he turned away from the computer and looked at me. We sat there for a beat, looking at each other grinning.
“Yeah,“ he said, “but was he good like this?“
His hand grabbed the back of my head and pulled me closer to him. When our lips pressed together I felt butterflies in my stomach. Fitting, since he was the person that initially introduced me to that song by Michael Jackson.
It dawned on me that I had carried a small crush on him for a while and here we were kissing, something I never thought would happen. The entire time our lips were pressed together I kept my eyes closed. I didn’t protest when I felt him slip his tongue between my lips. It seemed to fill my mouth up; it was all I could do to try and fit my tongue around his.
I pulled back just a little but his tongue didn’t leave my mouth. I took a step back with my foot. His hand moved away from the back of my head, but his tongue remained in my mouth. I took another step back. Still, the tongue. I opened my eyes. We were standing a full two feet apart but his tongue was still in my mouth.
Jesus, I thought. There was a loud noise and I could hear voices shouting from the living room. Someone was blasting the television. I needed to go investigate. He retracted his tongue.
I sat up in the bed and looked around my room. The noise was the television in the other room clicking itself on for the morning news.
Have I mentioned I’ve never met Anil in my life?
I know I'm not the only person to dream about bloggers I've never met. Who have you dreamed about?
I finally downloaded MT 2.0 and started playing with it. Oh my god. I am in love. First of all the look of the interface is all new, snazzy and easy to navigate. I am so impressed and in awe of Mena and Ben.
There are new features that I'm interested in adding but I'm still playing with them on the test.
Did I already say I love it?
look at this headline. They are so out of line for that.
boredom, restlessness
the need to try something new
i want to move on
Yes. Jen saw Al walk. I love Soap Net.
dedicated to the person who used the stall before me:
if you sprinkle when
you tinkle be a sweetie
and wipe the seatie.
kthxbi.
